Here is where you can learn about such Failblog mainstays as the bukkit, the ShamWOW, and the shellacked halibut.
A tool used to correct grammar mistakes. Although there is just one Bukkit, it is usually filled with different substances, depending on the user’s preference. It could be fluffy mousse, lark’s vomit, or any really really disgusting slime. Usually, the substance of the bukkit is the offender’s least favo(u)rite flavo(u)r of…something.
To use the bukkit, one must dunk one’s head into it after making a spelling mistake on FailBlog.
Used to clean up any kind of mess. Since the ShamWow is used so often and cleaned so rarely, it usually has just one clean corner that can be used to clean up the mess.
OUR ROFLCOPTER GOES SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI!! An old internet meme brought to Failblog and it stuck…so much so that Ben made a reference to it in a “Thank you” post he wrote to us. We bring out the roflcopter when something is just too hysterical for a mere *snork*.
The Shellacked Halibut
Is used to TWACK! inappropriate commentors. It could be bigots, racists, or any insulting trolls.
See the Epic Fails page. ‘Nuff said.
A Friday tradition amongst failbloggers to celebrate the end of the week and friendships with each other. Often accompanied by a bar and barbecue.
This is a most useful items when dealing with those who are perhaps not the sharpest knife in the drawer, or perhaps a sandwich short of a picnic. A *facepalm* is a gesture that denotes an emotion akin to “D’OH!” or “Ye gods, I can’t believe this person just said that” or even “This person completely missed the point!”
Much like a *facepalm* only more so.
The innuendo machine
A very powerful machine that measures the amount of sexual innuendo on the blog. However, since the amount of innuendo so often exceeds safe, factory-installed limits, the innuendo machine has a distressing tendency to explode. We’re working on the problem.
A mode of transportation made absolutely essential by the innuendo machine. When we climb aboard the smutbus, those who are faint of heart may want to click the “G-Rated Pics and Videos Only” link.
For an example of such a ride, click here.
An army of Bondfan4518 clones created for the express purpose of being destroyed. Never worry if you see BFF driving his Jeep off a cliff…it’s only one of his clones. (We do have to spend a ridiculous amount on replacement Jeeps for them, though.)
The Pink Sparkly Bat
This is Gracie’s weapon of choice for demolishing trolls. It is very dainty and sparkly, and has “Girl Power” etched into the handle.
Also known as “Bloggy”, this is the entity that constantly noms our posts and makes them disappear. Sometimes the Blogmonster is hungrier than ever, and sometimes he seems to favor posts with specific words in them. If you ever use the word “image” or “imagine”…or any word starting with “imag”…Bloggy will definitely eat your post.